Day 194

Brother in law is working every day including Sunday so no used washer and dryer for me. I’ve gone from super angry to super depressed. I am sick and tired of not being able to do laundry in my own home. It’s been a year for cripe’s sake!

Shane’s Lounge cc. 2011-2020

Day 192

Monday. I’m posting here because of the nature of my post. No one comes by here anyway, so I have more freedom and I can talk about/hash out the mortally embarrassing things here. This is sort of like a journal page today.

What is so mortally embarrassing? Just about everything. I came really close to having an actual nervous breakdown. No joke. My wife got really scared. 

My wife and I went together to grocery shop for her Mom’s friend, while I shopped for us and we met up when we were ready to checkout.

While we were out I left my son explicit instructions for cleaning the bathroom. But they were verbal, so he didn’t “get it” as far as what all was to be done. My fault. I should know by now that if it’s more than 1 thing I need to write it on paper or a whiteboard. 

I bought 2 new twin mattresses, and a twin bed frame, 2 mattress protectors, 2 packages of bed garters to keep the bottom sheet on the mattress, 4 sets of sheets. I still need to get 1 sheet of plywood cut to size. One bed has it already. The other bed we had was a double, but I wanted more room and didn’t want to spend much since my daughter won’t be using it much, or at all during the pandemic. I wanted it set up just in case she can recover at home, or have a home visit before surgery. 

So that’s not breakdown inducing. However I did tell my son to move things out of the bathroom so I could start organizing when I got home. He was also supposed to sweep and clean the floor. Not much got done. When moving things, how hard is it to keep everything in the approximate vicinity? I expected too much. I did explain multiple times, but I should have written a detailed list. My fault. My son can’t help it that he can’t follow verbal instructions. He needs written instructions to do a better job.

Anyway, I opened the lower part of the armoire in the bathroom, looking to quickly organize TP and feminine products. Mice feasted on my pricey 1 ply TP. It was a forking disaster area. I went from being super frustrated, to being hysterical. Not hysterical funny. Hysterical crying. I cleaned up the TP and boxed and sealed the open packages. My son came in to help and grabbed an open box of toilet tank parts. A mouse flew out and hit me in the belly, bounced off, then made a run for the floor heat register. That was it! I went from hysterical crying, to hysterical screaming, to hyperventilating. I couldn’t catch my breath. I just kept going at it, cleaning up the mess, and gasping because I couldn’t breathe. My wife, after trying to talk me into taking a break, came up and tried to calm me down. I couldn’t be calmed down. Yes, the mouse actually bounced off my belly when it made a break for it getting out of the box.

It’s been over 4 hours since it happened. My chest hurts from gasping for breath. I’m not even going to mention how bad my back and shoulders are.

I don’t know what to do anymore. Last week I did order/receive a door draft blocker for the back door. There is a gap between the bottom of the door and the threshold. Today I also bought a can of spray foam to fill any gaps around plumbing pipes and gas lines. After shopping and the bathroom chaos it was late and none of that got done today. I can’t move much now, did to much in the bathroom. Hoping to go full force tomorrow after our Best Buy appointment to transfer data and activate my wife’s new iPhone then transfer my son’s stuff to her old iPhone. Whenever we get a new iPhone the person with the oldest phone gets the iPhone that was replaced. We can’t afford for everyone to get a new iPhone, nor can we afford to buy the newest model. I look at available stock and prices and order accordingly. 

I had to take an Ativan when I went to sit down, calm down, and try to breathe. It helped a lot.

Shane’s Lounge cc.  2011-2020